HSP Topics: Filling in Dangerous "Blanks"

For me-- as well as for many of the HSPs I have met-- one of the more rewarding parts of the trait is the deep empathy we seem capable of. I have heard many describe this as literally "feeling others." This can range from a simple "picking up someone else's mood," to a few very highly attuned empaths who literally can "see someone's story" in an almost psychic manner.

Of course, this can also be rather overstimulating-- many HSPs have trouble with crowds, simply because the "psychic clutter" of so many people assaults their senses, on top of which they often have to explain themselves to friends who insist that they are just "imagining things." Even when they choose to not talk about their empathic gifts, HSPs often get their reluctance around crowds mislabeled as "social anxiety" or "shyness."

Regardless of whether you see your tendency to pick up moods and feelings as a "gift" or a "curse," it is often wise to not become overconfident. Because there are times when the "message" we think we have picked up is just plain wrong. And we can get into a heap of trouble by either insisting to our friend (who's actually quite OK) that they share whatever (we thought) is "wrong," or we attribute one of our own moods to something outside ourselves. Sometimes we simply "fill in blanks" that we had no business filling in.

Most people think of empathy and intuition as something we either "have" or "don't have," and whereas that may be true in a simplistic sense, they can also be trained and directed. For example, at the 2004 HSP Gathering in Three Rivers, CA, one of the workshops offered was on "Developing your Intuition." A large part of the focus was on learning to actually "tune in" to our intuition, rather than just "shoot from the hip." Similarly, in her book "Empowered by Empathy," author and empath Rose Rosetree suggests that we can learn to "manage" our empathic gifts. Her book is in the recommended reading list in the right hand column.

As is true of the HSP trait in general, learning about your empathy and intuition is important. The more you know, the more it can help your life, and the life of others.

TALK BACK: Do you sometimes catch yourself relying excessively on your abilities as an empath? Have you sometimes "filled in blanks" about people you would have been better off leaving alone? Do you experience your ability to sense others' moods as a benefit, or a drawback? Leave a comment!

The Power of Place, revisited

In a recent email "conversation," someone asked me if I ever feel "passion for a place." This prompted me to site down and think about the places where I have truly and deeply "felt" something. Indeed, I have what I can only describe as "magnet spots" in many different places. Some of these places I can logically figure out my attraction to, others are a mystery.

A bluff, deep in the woods in Denmark, near where our summer house was. The pebbly beach at Deception Pass, north end of Whidbey Island, Washington state. A particular bend in a tiny road called Croft Lane in the village of Croyde, North Devon, UK. A small roundabout with a small red brick house on the south-east side, in the Blue Ridge neighborhood of NE Seattle, WA. (don't ask, no idea, but it was for sale once-- only just under 1000 square feet). The gardens in front of the UBC Museum of Anthropology in Vancouver, BC. Mt.Tabor Park in Portland, OR. Pike Place Market, also in Seattle-- for some reason, the feeling gets strongest the closer I get to the "Y" where Pike Place joins Western Ave. (Beats me, I don't even live in Seattle, 2000 miles away, actually) I can visualize, smell and feel each of these places, pretty much at all times. There are other places which are now gone; which I can never return to, but they still exist more vividly than the "real" places I walk every day.

The strongest feeling I can ever remember having towards a place happened the first time I drove out of Sea-Tac (Seattle) airport and headed up towards the city. I can't even begin to describe it... it was like "seeing life" for the first time. I bawled out loud at the intensity of it; like someone might do whenthey see their first tree after being locked in isolation for 30 years. This wasn't anything "pretty"-- this was a crowded "spur" freeway leading out to Interstate 5. There was absolutely NO logical reason; I was overtaken by something inside. I dunno. I just don't. But it happens every time I pass that spot.

I speculate that maybe a parallel "shadow image," "echo" or a reincarnated part of my spirit from an earlier lifetime may be connected to some of these places. This was especially true with the airport incident. I know that sounds way out in la-la land, but I can't think of it any other way.

Interestingly enough, there are also places that just never feel "right," no matter how often I go back, or how long I live there. For example, I've lived in Austin for nearly 20 years, and there is no place here that moves me to anything beyond "indifference." Florida-- have never felt comfortable there. Pretty much all of the Eastern Seaboard.